HANDLING MISUNDERSTANDING IN MARRIAGE Pt.5

After praying with the children, my wife and I often pray together before sleeping. It is our bedroom prayer culture before closing our eyes. That particular night, I told her to pray since i lead prayers almost all the time but she refused. She told me to pray but I pushed it back to her. After waiting for her response, I decided I won't pray and both of us slept without praying together that night. The Spirit of God dealt with me about my foolishness. I became uncomfortable about what happened. I slept without praying with my wife. I realized that headship in the home is about responsibility and providing leadership at all times. God made me realize that It was my responsibility to take the lead while she follow. I don't know if God dealt with her on that matter till date but I knew the dealings of God with me was strong.

In the garden of Eden, God put man in-charge to tend and cultivate the garden. He was responsible for all including his wife. It would surprise you to know that when Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit, God didn't question the woman it was the man. Even though the man was lured by Eve, God cared less about that and faced the man saying: "...“Where are you?”, Genesis3:9 NLT. God in His omniscience knew all that happened, how Eve gave her husband the forbidden fruit to eat yet the first person he questioned was Adam asking him where He was. God put him in the driver seat but he couldn't find him there. Adam left his place of marital leadership and put the entire human race in trouble. When fathers/ husbands refuse to stay/ function in their divinely ordained place of leadership in the home, an entire generation may suffer for it.

When a vehicle crashes, the first person we question is the driver. It doesn't mean the driver is at fault but he is responsible to give an account of what happened. Who drives the communication that leads to fixing the missing understanding? The man. Whatever happens in your home, God will ask you. Severally, I've seen Christian wives seeking to resolve a lingering misunderstanding by reporting to their pastors because daddy isn't forthcoming. Often, it is a sign that the man has failed in his duty. As a husband, part of your headship duty is to ensure you fix the missing understanding reasonably. That doesn't mean your opinion must prevail always because you may not be right at all times. Being in the driver seat in times of misunderstandings is simply to ensure that you create the platform for heart-to-heart communication and reasoning for the restoration of peace and understanding. As the man, the outcome of your dialogue may reveal your faux pas and indiscretion, be quick to apologize and don't allow pride consume the peace of your marriage. Apologizing to your wife doesn't reduce you rather, it affirms that you're a responsible leader and it increases your respect rating. A higher dimension of this is when you apologize when you're not wrong all because you want peace to reign.