Proverbs15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. NIV
Homes are under serious attack from hell especially the marriages of believers. Years back, a Nigerian news outlet in February 2020 reported that a total of 4,000 divorce applications were filed before various courts in the Federal Capital Territory (FCT). That same month, 3000 divorce cases were reported in Badagry, a district in Lagos state. Inclusive in those divorce applications were marriages of believers who stood before God's altar and the people of God to love each other till death part them. Divorce distorts the plan of God for marriage; the excuse given for divorce often is "irreconcilable differences" which often result from misunderstanding.
You can divorce-proof your marriage if you handle misunderstanding the bible way. God's principles don't fail. The first step is to discover the missing understanding, followed by communicating what is missing in understanding. Previously, we said that it is possible to talk and not communicate. More important in communication is the manner in which we communicate when we want to resolve issues in our homes. The power of manners in communication cannot be shoved aside if we'll make a headway in times of misunderstandings. Nabal pressed the self destruct button because of his uncouth words to David's men but it took Abigail's wise words and her manner of communication to save him from his folly.(1 Sam25) "You can't resolve misunderstandings in a shouting match, calling each other unprintable names while "Mrs" is rolling her eye balls like an analog doll baby."
Words are powerful but how we say them wields more power.
In moments of anger, words from your mouth will likely set the house on fire. In fact, don't attempt to handle misunderstanding when you're angry. An angry man is a semi mad man. You can quench the fire of misunderstanding with soothing words. The bible says, "The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life,..."( Proverbs15:4). The goal of communication in misunderstanding is to bring healing and to supply the missing understanding. Apostle Paul said, "Let your conversation be gracious and attractive so that you will have the right response for everyone"(Col4:6). You cannot answer wrath and anger with harsh words. If you mean to quench the embers of strife, answer wrath with gracious words. Madness is not cured with madness.
Access your manner of communication. Does it bring healing or it adds to strife?