RELATIONSHIPS THAT WON'T WORK Pt.3

WHERE PURPOSE IS NOT DEFINED

When I wanted to marry, one thing I settled with my wife was about the direction in which God was leading me. Though as at then, I thought I'll be in academia partly but I knew that there's nothing I'll do in life without preaching the Gospel. Long before I left campus, I knew that I had an assignment in ministry which must be fulfilled. I remember vividly that the day she visited our house for the first time, I heard my mom telling her that "my son has a ministry". She said that to lay emphasis on my purpose and assignment in life so that the future won't be strange to her. I thank God I married my wife. After God, I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing today if not for her support. No man is fit to marry until purpose is discovered and defined. Purpose discovery leads to spouse discovery.

One vital aspect of marriage that is often neglected is the aspect of God ordained purpose for marriage and for those going into marriage. There's a general purpose God had in mind for marriage because He is the founder of the marriage institution not man. God will never institute a thing without a clear purpose in mind. God is purposeful and intentional in all He does. From scriptures, it is made clear that God primarily instituted marriage for companionship, to maintain sexual purity and lastly for procreation. This is just general purpose. For the individuals going into marriage, God have specific/ peculiar purpose for their union and this is connected to their personal assignment in life and ministry.

When marriage is not contracted with the understanding of God's purpose, the relationship may not work. The pursuit of purpose fuels love between couples. I have seen couples who separated partly because the husband became a pastor but the wife wasn't ready to give her support. That can happen in any marriage where the two are going in different directions or do not understand and accept each other's assignment in life. Support will be lacking in such marriage. I am not saying that the purpose of the two going into marriage must be exactly the same rather it must complement each other. The glorious destinies of some brothers and sisters died the very day they entered into marriage with someone who does not accept their life's assignment. All through the marriage, they keep struggling to revive their dream but the killer of that dream sleeps with them on the bed. Marriage should not kill your individual uniqueness and assignment, it should enhance it. The moment you enter or you're about entering into courtship, this issue must be settled to be sure that marriage will not be a burial ground of all that God has endowed and invested into your life.