1Thess4:3 It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control your own body[a] in a way that is holy and honorable
When I was about to marry my wife, we started the normal procedure for counseling in her church. She relocated from Akure to Lagos but was still connected to her Pastor in Akure. The church in Lagos is under the same leadership but her Pastor in Akure was interested in our relationship because that's her spiritual father so it was as if we needed to be here and there. When we started our courtship, in a conversation, her Pastor in Akure said, 'there would be times you'll feel like having sex with her during this courtship.' The way he said it in Yoruba sounded funny.
Years after, when we were closer to the wedding, the Pastor in Lagos asked us in his office, 'how many sex times have you had'? I wasn't expecting that question because I felt counseling should centre around knowing us better, our convictions and how to be better couples. Thank God our answer was 'None' and that was the truth. However, if it was yes, what would have happened? I think I know what would have happened. The foundation of our marriage would have been faulty and we may have had trust issues.
Fornication is a sin before God. No matter the colour we want to paint it. As long as you're not married to that lady or brother legally, you're not meant to have sex. Courtship doesn't automatically confer on you the right to have her body& vice versa. Today, the pervading belief is that if you don't have sex before marriage, you may not know how compatible you are on bed. That's a big lie from hell. If every guy have to test drive you like a car, they'll always find a car with better engine, good mileage and better suspension. The moment you allow sex before marriage, you begin to lay a foundation of distrust and suspicion for your marriage because your minds would be wired to think like 'If we can cheat together before marriage, we can cheat on each other in marriage'.
Father, purify my heart and deliver me from lust In Jesus name.