MODELING BIBLICAL MARRIAGE TO YOUR CHILDREN

When my parents celebrated their 40th wedding anniversary, I posted on my facebook wall that their marriage was the first marriage seminar I attended. The youth wing of a church invited me to come explain what I meant by that post. The first marriage seminar I attended was not a formal meeting where singles gathered to hear a marriage counselor teach. The casual observation of how my parents lived together and raised us formed the base line knowledge I have about marriage. Consciously or unconsciously, everyone attended their first marriage seminar under the roof of their parents/ guardian. Sadly, despite the increase in knowledge about marriage in this age, marriages are still failing including that of marriage counselors because a faulty foundation. Until God deals with unbiblical marriage model and mentality that some people learnt from their parents, knowledge( from books&seminars) won't be helpful.

From my personal observation, modeling a godly life and christian marriage imparts children more than mere oral teaching. Children learn quickly through observation and imitation. The foundation upon which your children will build their marriage is what you're laying now. Have you wondered why wife battery continues in our society despite the awareness? Research reveals that most of the men who beat their wives saw their dad do same to their mothers. In homes where fathers abuse their wives physically, sons grow up to think it is the right thing to do when their wives offend them. There are irresponsible and uncaring husbands today because most of them were raised by irresponsible fathers. They didn't have the opportunity of learning biblical fatherhood under a good father.

There are wives who picked the habit of verbal abuse from their mother. They were raised by a mother that was never submissive, always nagging and ready to pick a quarrel. Divorce, polygamy, single parenting ( "baby mama syndrome") and infidelity is not an exemption in this matter. Most divorcée come from broken homes where their parents think the best way to resolve differences is to part ways. Polygamous& unfaithful parents breeds children that may likely do same. The cycle continues. Unfortunately, we live in a society where we quickly conclude that these evil cycle is a generational curse whereas it is the product of irresponsibility taught and transferred from one generation to another. What kind of marriage do you desire for your children? You need to make your marriage a model that your children can imitate and build on. Be intentional about doing the right thing for them to see so that they can learn. God the father exemplifies modeling correct fatherhood and Jesus confirms it by saying: "...I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does", John 5:19 NLT. This is how it should be.