Proverbs 19:2 Enthusiasm without knowledge is no good; haste makes mistakes (NLT)

ANY RELATIONSHIP RUSHING YOU INTO MARRIAGE

I have been privileged by grace to handle a few marital issues especially those with turbulent marriages. I don’t call for them but they come to my table anyway.

I began to take marital counseling serious when i discovered that 70% of those i counsel bring marital issues to my table either single or married. Interestingly, they are believers.

As an observant person that I am, i noticed common trends in all cases brought to me. The mistakes made by some persons are similar and could have been avoided if they had a good counselor or someone who could point them to some of these things i’ve been teaching and shall continue to teach.

I have seen couples who shouldn’t have been married in the first place because they’re totally apart in ideologies and value-system. They have no point of connection at all. I wish someone had told them to disembark in their single days.

However, they are married and they have to live with the choice they’ve made by working on their marriages.

To the single brother or sister reading this, do not let anyone marry you hastily under the guise of “time is no longer on my side” when you don’t know him/her well. Many have succumbed to that kind of pressure and they married a beloved stranger.

Those who want to quickly rush into marriage after few weeks/months of courtship often have something they don’t want you to discover in the process of time. This is very common to deceitful people.

I’ll be lying by saying i haven’t seen couples embittered about a secret discovered months or years after marriage. No one loves to be deceived but if we fail to do due diligence, we may fall victim.

Those that have something to hide know you may disvover certain secrets with time. Such persons often try hard to get innocent persons committed quickly by taking them to the altar.

The truth about any marriage that will last is that the foundation must be laid solidly during courtship. A courtship where due diligence is done. This requires quality time not necessarily too long a duration.

Beware of falling in love with “strangers”. Before accepting to go to the altar, you must have satisfied your conscience, righteous curiosity and have basic knowlegde about the person you’re in love with.

You can’t meet someone last month and start planning marriage this month. That’s absurd. Use the season of courtship to verify claims even the schools he/she claimed to have attended. Do not let him/her put you under pressure to tie the knot immediately

In every court of law, cases are examined, cross examined and re examined before the judge gives a final verdict.

There’s a “court” in courtship. Feel free to also examine, cross examine and re examine before going to the altar where you both will be pronounced husband and wife. This takes quality time( not necessarily too long a time) and patience.

Note, there are things only God can reveal to you but there are things you can sense by careful observation as you relate over time. In all, be prayerful and sensitive.

Let time take its full course. Beware of micro wave relationship/ courtship.

ACTION POINT: Is he/she putting you under pressure to marry quickly when you haven’t known each other sufficiently? If yes, that’s a red flag, run.
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