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1 Kings 11: 4 For it came to pass, when Solomon was old, that his wives turned away his heart after other gods: and his heart was not perfect with the Lord his God, as was the heart of David his father.


When I was single, I took interest in a particular sister. From all indications especially her looks, she was one we’ll call ‘Sister’. You know what i mean. We got talking one day and i discovered she doesn’t mind taking alcohol and sees no big deal in partying.

The way she said it, i saw someone who may drive me to wild parties, get me drunk and mess up my life. I couldn’t imagine myself, an aspiring preacher ( in fact I was already preaching at that time) in revelry.

I thought i was being too cautious when i abandoned that relationship not until i met someone who told me why she broke up with another young minister she got engaged to. The reasons are the same. She began to party.

One of the signs of a dangerous relationship singles must watchout for is to discern if their relationship is drawing them away from the Lord or deepening their walk with God.

No relationship can leave you neutral. It is either you’re getting stronger in the Lord or getting weaker. Some relationships are fire-extinguishing relationships. They kill all you’ve built spiritually for years.

King Solomon got entangled with strange women who were idolatrous. They were not worshipping “Yahweh”. Blindly, he got himself entangled and he backslid. Relationship with an unbeliever is a no no for a Christian no matter how nice they are.

Solomon’s devotion to the Lord waned to the point where the bible said, *”And Solomon DID EVIL in the sight of the Lord, and went not fully after the Lord, as did David his father*”(1 Kings 11:6).

This same King had an encounter with God twice but because of wrong relationship, he became an idol worshipper. He built altars for Idols: “Then did Solomon build an high place for Chemosh, the abomination of Moab, in the hill that is before Jerusalem, and for Molech, the abomination of the children of Ammon”( 1 Kings 11:7).

Certain things are pretty easy to predict. You can predict a marriage will be turbulent right from courtship days by looking at the person you’re journeying with. Does he/she love the Lord by obeying his word?

Loving the Lord isn’t judged by church attendance alone but by obedience to the Lord: *”If you love me, keep my commands*”( John 14:15). Obedience to God is the proof of love not tears shed in worship.

She may be a chorister with a sonorous voice, he may be in the prayer band always speaking capital letter or “sulphuric” tongues or he may be the president or sisters coordinator of your youth/ campus fellowship, all that is no proof of love for God but the correctness of life. That’s the real deal.

If you’re in a relationship with someone who doesn’t love the Lord or someone who doesn’t share same biblical values with you, run.

If that relationship has extinguished your prayer fire, bible study, devotion and commitment to God or has made you compromise your christian values, run.

You don’t need a prophet to tell you how your marriage will be.

Action point: Are you in a relationship that is drawing you away from the Lord instead of drawing you closer to the Lord? If yes, please run. It is a toxic relationship that will end in a toxic marriage.